Somehow when I decided to look for a new place to live, I focused so intently on that task that I completely lost my interest in writing. My mojo went house hunting, then house buying, then packing, unpacking, and so on. Perhaps because in retirement there’s so little real pressure on how I spend my days, I’ve lost the knack of multitasking. If I accomplish … Continue reading Hoping my mojo finally discovered my forwarding address
It doesn’t take much to amuse me. Plus, I’m retired. Spending the morning thinking about, taking pictures of, and now writing about my socks does not seem like a completely pitiful waste of time. I mean, it’s definitely a questionable use of my time, but not a complete waste since I’m entertaining myself and not rummaging around in the kitchen for a snack. That’s how … Continue reading Mysterious travel socks because, why not?
It’s interesting traveling to a foreign country where English is the primary language. You might assume that communication won’t be an issue, but the different accents and slang can at times make you wonder if you’re speaking the same language at all. Case in point, in October I traveled to Northern Ireland to meet my friend Bernadette. She was born in Northern Ireland but has … Continue reading Breda’s gaze
I just addressed a get well card to a friend’s mother. She’s in the hospital back in my home town, so I went online to check the hospital’s mailing address. As I copied the street number on the envelope, I realized I didn’t need to check the zip code, even though I haven’t lived there in many years. Like my first phone number (Howard 6 … Continue reading Memory glitches
Today Tom the “pond guy” showed up at 10 a.m. to put my backyard pond to bed for the winter. He emailed last week to say it was time. I emailed back and said yes, just let me know when to expect you. No response. The dogs went nuts when his little blue VW Beetle pulled into the drive and I, hair askew, still in … Continue reading No more apologies
It’s as if my house knows I’m leaving the country for nearly two weeks. Why? Because things are going wrong. Very wrong. It started when my son Chris came over to help me clean out the basement a little over a week ago. I had seen mouse droppings and a tiny mouse carcass earlier this summer and without backup, I wasn’t about to shift the … Continue reading Murphy’s law for travel plans
Do you have Facebook friends you’ve never met? I do. Mostly they’re friends of friends I’ve met through writing, specifically at Erma Bombeck Humor Writers workshops. Usually I read something funny, laugh and comment, connect, and there you go. I also have some “friends” who I honestly don’t remember at all. It may be time to weed out the list, I’m thinking. If I were … Continue reading Why I’m not sad about sex
We could be twins. Yes. Amy’s hilarious. I’m sporadically funny. Amy is young and blonde and a tad chunky. I’m old, dyed-brown-over-gray, and morbidly obese. Amy is wildly successful, talented, and rich. I was as successful as I wanted to be, have some skills, and can afford now to retire, albeit modestly. And we’re both unlikely introverts. Just. The. Same. I’m on this little fantasy … Continue reading Amy Schumer and me
First, the good news: I’m going to Ireland in October. Yay! I will be spending most of the trip as a guest in the home of my dear friend Bernadette’s sister, Breda. Breda’s home is in tiny Pigeon Top near the city of Omagh, which is about 70 miles or so west of Belfast. Bernadette, who lives on the Isle of Man, will fly … Continue reading Confessions of a picky palate
This week I went to a new dentist, recommended by my periodontist. The fact that I just referred to “my periodontist” should be your first clue that my relationship with my teeth has been a long, complicated, and expensive one. You could start calling me Elizabeth, what with all the crowns in my mouth. Ba da bum. I’ve also treated myself to numerous root canals, … Continue reading Bills with teeth
Kate Mahar writes . . . 